Night Light
by V.Evergreen
Summary: There were many things Pepper supposed could annoy her about Tony Stark but it's just her luck that one thing that does is the one thing that he depends on. This time she's going to have to be the one to adapt.


She didn't notice it for the first few nights but the more she shared a bed with Tony Stark the more incapable she became of sleeping.

Pepper didn't see it at first, she just assumed that the strangeness of sharing her bed with someone was the cause of her sudden insomnia It wasn't until a few days later when she realised that she loved, even relished, in the feeling of another body next to her at night that she concluded that wasn't it. It surprised even her how much she loved being able to climb into bed and crawl into someone else's arms. It made her feel safe in a way she couldn't describe; it wasn't like she was a person in need of protection but it felt nice to have it nonetheless.

The next thought was that maybe it was residual worry that she would wake up alone. When she had started sleeping with Tony, in _both_ senses of the word, there was always a half formed whisper at the back of her mind telling her that this wouldn't be any different from the string of girls that had preceded her. Never a conscious thought, for then she could have brushed it aside, but just a niggle, the small voice of self doubt that assured her that he would be gone by the morning and she would just be another fling in the wake of a hundred others.

He was always there, arms wrapped securely around her with his breathing deep and even, he seemed so solid and just so real that eventually she just accepted it. He would always be there. Her worries vanished along with her doubts which left only the question, _why couldn't she sleep?_

It was only when she lay awake looking at the ceiling, awash with the backlight of the reactor, that she realised. It was the damn implant and all of its stupid light. She would have groaned if she didn't mind waking Tony. It only got worse from there. It seemed now that she had acknowledged her annoyance the light only got brighter. Soon the only thing holding her back from sleep was the sheer force of her irritation at that stupid gentle light.

She tried everything. She went to bed early in a bid to fall asleep before the inevitable light pervaded her senses. She tried to wear a sleeping mask. She waited until Tony was asleep and slept with her back to him. It was no use, if she went to bed early she would only awake later and be unable to drift back off due to the eerie blue glow of their room, she couldn't sleep with a sleeping mask; it irritated her almost as much as the light until she ended up ripping it off and throwing it across the room in a show of frustration. Sleeping with her back to him was no use, the light would reflect off of the walls, mocking her as it illuminated their room and cast half shadows. By this point Pepper was sure that her mind was exaggerating, after all when looking at it objectively the light cast from the reactor was minimal, it was only a big deal because Pepper had made it so. That didn't help her sleep though.

Once or twice she thought about talking to Tony about it, but she found she couldn't. The man, despite what other said, was well aware of his own flaws, and she didn't want to tack on another one to the list. Tony Stark wasn't a self conscious man (she doubted he knew the meaning of the word) but she knew that if one thing could make him insecure then it would be the fact that something he needed caused Pepper a problem and she knew that out of anyone on this planet, she was one of the very few to wield such a power over him to make him self-conscious.

Besides, however much she hated that little light she was insanely grateful for what it symbolised. It told her that Tony was alive. That he was strong enough to beat the odds and if he needed to he could do again. For that she could suffer a few restless nights.

~o~o~o~

It wasn't until Tony was sent on a week long mission to the Middle-East that she noticed the difference. He and the team had been radio silent for three days so far and counting. She was worried for all of them, of course she was, the mansion felt too big without them. She hadn't appreciated the way Thor's booming laugh could fill up a room when he was here, nor had she realised how she relied on Bruce's gentle conversation or Steve's old time manners. Though she never made any noise unless she wanted to, Pepper found she missed the constantly smirking presence of Natasha in the room and Clint's razor sharp wit. The rooms seemed too big for her now but it was nothing to her big her bed felt compared to her.

It was on her second night of no sleep that she finally stumbled across the reason for her alertness. She missed that damn reactor! That light she spent most of her time at night resenting and now she couldn't sleep without it! It made sense though in a twisted way, at least if she could see the light she knew Tony was safe even if it did keep her up all night.

Sighing she go up and opened the door to their room. Feeling like a child she put the hall light on, left her door ajar and crawled back under the covers looking at the light being cast into the room. It still wasn't right: the colour was wrong and it didn't shift as the reactor did when Tony moved but it was enough to lull her into an uneasy sleep.

For the rest of that week she repeated the ritual. Her worry was only slightly eased by a message from Fury saying that they had received a transmission from the group and they were heading back to the barracks they had been assigned as quarters. She wore a smile on her face that day to match the dark bruises under her eyes. She counted the days until Tony would be home all the while maintaining a professional mask at the seemingly endless meetings and conference calls. It was only at night when she let a little light flood into her bedroom that she allowed herself to feel exhausted and lonely. As much as she had hated that light when it had been the bane of her night all she could do now was miss it and await its return.

~o~o~o~

Pepper had always been a light sleeper so when she heard noise coming from the workshop on the floor below she was woken. In her sleep befuddled state she couldn't quite work out what that sound could be but when the door of their bedroom swung open before closing gently and the bed dipped under the weight of another person she figured it out.

No sooner had Tony climbed into the bed absolutely catatonic in his sleep deprivation had Pepper turned and wrapped her arms around him. By the time he looked down at her she was already asleep with her head resting beside the reactor and a small contented smile playing around her lips.

~o~o~o~

The next morning Pepper awoke feeling well rested for the first time in what felt like far too long. Sunlight flooded the room making it look everything looked better and more hopeful with it's glow.

By the feel of Tony's breathing Pepper was pretty sure he was still asleep. She moved her head slightly and looked at his face. His hair was in a complete disarray and his face was slack with sleep and while she was beyond relieved to have him back in one piece, let alone relatively unharmed, she couldn't help the small frown that appeared on her face when she saw a graze that ran along his cheekbone. No doubt from the mission but even still she was loathe to see it there.

It was while she was still staring at him that a small smile curved his mouth and he asked, "So, how was your week?" Pepper started at the question; she had honestly thought he was asleep. His voice was thick with sleep and his eyes were still closed but there was no mistaking the playful tone that pulled at his voice.

"Quieter than usual." Was her reply as she fought to keep her voice light, "How about you?"

Tony opened his eyes and looked at her blearily, "Same old, same old. Though I did learn something quite interesting."

Pepper raised her eyebrows, "Oh, and what was that?"

"I was sharing a room with Clint at the barracks-"

"Should I be worried?" Asked Pepper trying and failing to hold back a snicker.

Tony sent her a sarcastic look before continuing, " -and he told me he couldn't sleep. Apparently, the light from this thing," He said tapping the reactor lightly with his fingers, " kept him up. He said he didn't know how you could stand it."

Pepper had a vague idea where this was going and the irony of him only figuring it out now she didn't mind the it threatened to make her laugh, though she knew that this was not the right time for such a reaction. She wondered if due to this revelation he might be more suited to being called Irony Man. She tried to bite back her smile and look serious.

"So I was wondering, I mean I know you don't always sleep too well, and well… is it because of me?"

Pepper looked up at him and while she knew that he was genuinely curious she could see the hope in his eyes that it wasn't his fault.

She smiled up at him and answered honestly, "It doesn't bother me. In fact, I can't really sleep without it."

Tony tightened his hold around her and felt the good humour work its way into his voice, "Why, Miss Potts, I never thought you'd be one to need a night light."

….

A/N- Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! If you liked it or if you didn't please leave a review to tell me what you think-

All the best,

VE


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